Mornington Crescent: It's Lim'ricks Two Thousand and Eight!

Game 339:

"It's Lim'ricks Two Thousand and Eight!"

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Rosie: For I have but few
Blob: And all those are askew
Red Wolf: And I can't chew my onions and beef!
jim: Yeh, me choppers is given me grief!
Marc : And my false set was pinched by a thief
Rosie: I'm gnashing my gums
momus: Back to Oxford with Guns
Software: Slurping soup will give me relief
penelope: Now to eyes - mine are dimming with age
Chalky: I've mistaken star anise for sage
Rosie: Those carrots look puce
Phil: I can't think how the deuce
gil: I'm going to read the next page
Chalky: My knees are beginning to crumble
Bif: So excuse me for not being humble
Rizmage: I cannot kneel down
Software: That quite makes me frown
Red Wolf: But I prefer not to bumble.
Rosie: There was a wee laddie from Fife
Rizmage: Who castrated himself with a knife
Raak: It took half an hour
Phil: In a freezing cold shower
Chalky: But it started a trend that's now rife
- deliberately avoiding the popularist knife/wife/strife scenario which CdM [and others, maybe] may thank me for :-)
Chalky: My plan to escape's come a cropper
irach: I've just been espied by a copper
Ameena: He's coming to get me
Kim: I doubt that he'll let me
Rosie: Get 'way with my well-rehearsed whopper.
Simons Mith: The words of the great poet Keats
Bif: Are considered by some as great feats
irach: Whereas those of Yeats
penelope: Are ranked up with the greats
Projoy: And, in short, are poetic elites.
Blob: So Hilary's pipped B. Obama (My original line ended "New Hampshire", but I decided this was a tad tricky to rhyme !)
Raak: How exciting to see so much drama
Phil: It's a shame no-one cares
Rizmage: Or answers our prayers
Software: But Dubya will soon be a goner
Bif: John McCain says that he can still win it
Marc: Well at least if the rest choose that they’ll quit
irach: But ol' Huckabee
Ameena: Says "If you count to three,
Software: "God will take earth and begin it"
CdM: Sometimes I get nostalgic for the old days of the limerick police.
Simons Mith: I've noticed the odd bit of lumpy copy too. Hopefully more practice will eventually make perfect.
I am not a political creature
Raak: This isn't a bug, but a feature
Bif: My interests lie
Quendalon: In sex, booze and pie
penelope: I'm a party-political Nietsche
Marc: For sure we all need taking lessons [Pen] maybe teacher or preacher had been better alternatives?
Marc: We need better rhyming for sure ...I confess, lessons was a lousy choice...
Projoy: But the skill (for a few) is obscure [Marc] Nietschze worked fine for me (unlike, it has to be said "they'll quit" as a rhyme for "win it")
Rosie: For some people, though Have a go at that.
Chalky: The poetry doth flow - [pen] 'Nietsche' - inspired!
Software: For the rest - we'll hope for a cure
Ameena: There's an ancient-old way to remember
penelope: The order in which to dismember [Marc] No dear. I think mine was better. That's why I wrote it down.
Marc: This Corpus delicti [Pen] Oh Dear, my mistake, I thought you were aiming at Friedrich Nietzsche (a rather well known German philosopher in case you didn’t know) who pronounced his name Neetshe. I didn’t realize there was a British word Nietsche hitherto unknown to me that you obviously pronounce Nietshure. I am so sorry!
penelope: [Marc] funny that.
Bif: "Juste ftart at ye left eye awooga! unfinished...
Simons Mith: [Marc] Your ignorance about how we English pronounce 'creature' and 'feature' fills me with shame. :-)
Bif: Remarkable. We got all of 140 odd lines in before we started bickering. A new record. I pronounce it Neecha, which is how I've always heard it. I've never studied philosophy, so I didn't 'get' the joke. That works out to deuce I think. If we've got to start accomodating native pronunciation of foreign words we need some sort of cue markup so we can know whether it is meant to be read as 'Parriss' or 'Parree'. I mean, we don't want any sort of interpretation taking place do we?
Bif: And why didn't anyone work in a 'winnet' in that John McCain one?
Rosie: Preserve till the fifth of November. (Marc) You should have twigged, and not dug a hole for yourself).
Marc: There once was an ignorant poet [Rosie] You know better?
Kunta: Who wrote silly songs for a duet
Each morning ‘bout nine
He wrote one more line
Then went back to bed with his brunet
Néa: The foreigners don't say it right!
Phil: 'Cept for Néa, who's actually quite bright. To avoid criticism, I'm pronouncing "actually" as "ackshly" (two syllables). Ithangyew. :-)
Chalky: A legend, indeed
Rosie: And what's more, a Swede, (Chalky) That was easy :-). (Marc) I know everything. It's one of my less attractive Fietzsches.
Marc: And that’s why he fills us with fright! (Rosie) I knew that you knew better!
CdM: [Marc] Your comment to pen was completely uncalled for. First of all, as everyone here except you seems to agree, Nietzsche was a perfectly good rhyme (and it is particularly odd that you think that teacher or preacher would have been better). Second after you hit the trifecta with your line in the McCain limerick ((i) it didn't scan; (ii) it didn't rhyme; (iii) it didn't make sense), a little more humility would really have been in order.
Is there something that Néa's not told us?
Marc: Maybe he is the cause of this big fuss? [CdM] Please go back and check, I posted a humble question to Pen if possibly another few words could be a better alternative than Nietsche as I did not find it to rhyme creature or feature. Then shit hit the fan and the rest is history. If I am to blame please forgive me, if others are to be blamed they should be forgiven! Let the one without sin cast the first stone.....
Software: First get her gender right
Rosie: So we can end a fight (Marc) If that's "humble" then I'm a lampshade. It was heavy sarcasm. Stop making an arse of yourself; it's getting embarrassing.
Marc: That’s that then, no more to discuss!
Marc: Some buggers can’t read they just write
Bif: Or screw up the scansion in spite Finished or not, your choice
Néa: But keeping the peace
_tim_: Are the lim'rick police
jim: And they won't show much sweetness and light!
Constable Mith: I'm arrestin' the 'ole sorry lot
Rosie: On the grounds that it's all gone to pot
Ali: If you can't just play games
JudgeChalky: Without naming of names
You'll go down, son - until the year dot
Chalky: When the freed gain their freedom - we cheer
Phil: And I'll lay on a hogshead of beer
Rosie: I'll tootle my horn that's one thing you can do with it
Ameena: Though it's getting well-worn
Software: And we'll party all night - never fear!
Bif: New PC? Go Linux? Or Mac? The perennial questions are the best ones
Software: I say bring good old DOS back
Simons Mith: Be sure to stay calm
Raak: And instead, buy a Palm
StormWraith: And learn some alternative hack.
Marc: Some lines are so close to perfection
CdM: Whereas some provoke armed insurrection
Rosie: This may be the way
Software: As some pundits say
Bif: Of Darwinian poet selection

Game over! And what a splendid game it was, too.

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